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Home Why We May Never Have Another Good Duke Nukem Game

Why We May Never Have Another Good Duke Nukem Game

Reggie James

Reggie is a 27 year old black man currently living in California. He has been playing video games for over 20 years and currently works as a hardware engineer. If you're looking to be offended you can follow him on twitter at TNAMEAT

May 21, 2015 News
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It would appear a 15-month lawsuit has finally been resolved between 3D Realms and Gearbox over the Duke Nukem IP and subsequent games. According to documents obtained by NeoGaf, the lawsuit that was filed by Gearbox in February of 2014 over the franchise IP has been settled.

For those unacquainted, Gearbox gained the right to develop and publish the universally panned Duke Nukem Forever game. While the game was being launched, Gearbox claimed that they had the full rights to the Duke Nukem IP. This meant that a 3D Realms game called Duke Nukem Mass Destruction could no longer be made by 3D Realms; a game their parent company Interceptor Games announced would be made.

The Mass Destruction game was later morphed into the upcoming game Bombshell which Gearbox claims still bares too much resemblance to the Duke Nukem property, and so of course a lawsuit was filed, a lawsuit that now seems to be coming to an end. The full settlement has still not been released but it would appear that 3D Realms can actually buy back the Nukem IP at it’s equal/original price. This would mean that Gearbox could essentially lose the Duke Nukem franchise rights despite 3D Realms/Interceptor’s possible alleged violation of the handover contract. Now this could not happen one way or another due to potentially expensive stipulations that would go along with a buy-back, but it is possible—eventually.

Tears of joy?

Tears of joy?

The Problem for Duke Nukem Fans

Honestly, does it matter which terrible company gets a hold of this property? As far as I’m concerned, someone needs to just step in and take this away from both developers. 3D Realms can’t seem to finish any project and their latest debacle with Gearbox signifies that they’re probably shady as hell; not to mention inept.

Gearbox can’t seem to make a good game no matter what the property to save their life. They even somehow managed to screw up Aliens: Colonial Marines a game pretty much the entire universe wanted to be good. Everyone wanted Duke Nukem Forever to be good as well. So maybe it’s time both these developers had their toys taken away from them.

Do We Need Duke?

Is Dukes needed in these times filled with rampant SJWs looking to tear apart anything that doesn’t fit their staunch ideals? Duke represents red pill masculinity and it is scorchingly unapologetic about it. I wanted Duke Nukem Forever to be a masterpiece, a nostalgic trip back to the glory days when me and my friend would put on cheats to make some of the villains half naked women, or turn the pillars into strippers and or chained concubines.

In a world where Tomb Raider has smaller boobs and any whiff of stark masculinity in a video game drives SJWs up the wall its important to have a game like Duke Nukem to keep to balance in gaming culture.

Duke misses Lara's old tits as well. (Artwork by xkalipso)

Duke misses Lara’s old tits as well. (Artwork by xkalipso)

Both 3D Realms and Gearbox are quite respectively garbage and don’t deserve the rights to the IP. Besides, what if Duke Nukem was given to a social justice ridden developer like Neatherealm? (How weird is it to say that?) It could be turned into a “feminist” story where Duke Nukem is reduced to a side character who learns to “respect women” or something socially “progressive” like that. Wow, I need to stop using quotation marks.

If Duke Nukem can’t be trusted in anyone’s hands, so maybe it’s time to let the franchise die. It was a good series for what it was, and the old games still offer me a lot of entertainment. I’d rather it die with some dignity than become something horrid and unplayable. And perhaps 3D Realms is moving on as well, when asked about the settlement 3D Realms denied to comment but did offer this little nugget:

We’re super excited for Bombshell to release this summer.

If the Duke Nukem franchise is to end I hope that we all remember it’s legacy with a smile, and then we’ll look into the digital heavens where a constellation will be formed of Duke; most likely having a threesome with two amazingly beautiful CG women. One can only hope. Duke Nukem….Forever….

Read Next: The Two Gods of Marvel vs Capcom 2 Duke It Out Once Again 

May 21, 2015Reggie James
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Reggie James

Reggie is a 27 year old black man currently living in California. He has been playing video games for over 20 years and currently works as a hardware engineer. If you're looking to be offended you can follow him on twitter at TNAMEAT

May 21, 2015 News
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